June 30, 2015
This week has been really hard..........
I feel so horrible and I'm at war with myself I want to keep fig hint this battle but i feel like i have let everyone i love down and I can't be strong. I know what i should do but my mind tells me one thing but my heart tells me another. I want thing to go back to normal but i don't know what that is. I want ti stay strong because i know god is behind me and h won't let me down. In this short life i have lived I've learned not to get to comfortable because nothing is forever. Though it sucks to say i feel like i have been soooo blind and made myself to easy acceptable to everything that goes around me that i choice not to see the obvious. I love hard and i think thats my problem because i choice what i want to see and what i don't and that scares me because i never thought that i would be that person. IM scared i have become some i am not. Im feeling so low and so hopeless. I can't be their for myself or the love of my life, he is going through a hard time and i don't know how to be there for him i want to show him that i am not giving up on him but i have given up on myself and i am trying to prove myself wrong so i signed up for classes and i am trying to make the best of the situation me and my boo are facing. I know we are string and we will get through this but i second guess everything. Good night